Perceptive students contemplate philosophical classics while pondering their position within the education apparatus.
YEAR: 2014
RUNTIME: 3:30
VOICES: Jasmine Moreau, Olivier Mercier
MUSIC (sampled): Anton Webern, 6 Orchestral Pieces
Script
…and now it’s time to grade the work of some key philosophers from Greece.
The first is Thales, a metaphysician. He has a theory that everything is made of water.
Uh, hey, Thales, ever heard of rocks? Jeez, I could’ve sworn they were solid… Back to
the drawing board, Thales – idiot. F.
And now Parmenides. After years of deep thought he has concluded that change is
impossible – yeah that’s right, everything always stays exactly the same, for eternity.
Uh-huh; say, how much shit did you smoke before coming up with that one,
Parmenides? F
Next, let’s check in on Anaximander, who claims that the stars are closer to the earth
than the moon. Sorry, wrong, Anaximander. A kid in elementary school would be thrown
out on their ass for saying something as stupid as that. Honestly, people work hard to
put their kids through years of school, and that’s the kind of shit they come up with? F .